November 2008
9 posts
Take it from fucking Frankie Valli & The Four...
WALK LIKE A MAN!
Nothing is worth fucking anything if you can’t do it like a man. Fuck a weakass spring, put a FIRING FIVE MACHINE GUNS AT ONCE in your step.
WOWOWOWOWOW
Doing my daily rounds on the intarnet today, I found out that Blognigger completely cancelled the internet in one mindblowingly brilliant post. KILLIN’ IT! Link below bitches cool guys! Shit’s going to open in a new window.
Some other shit is also posted below. Just some shit I found on my phone’s memory card.
SHUT EM DOWN, SHUT EM SHUT EM DOWN SHUT EM DOWN
Huge day! BIG BIG NEWS!
This news is so big THAT PUNY AND THEREFORE GAY LOWERCASE LETTERS CANNOT HANDLE IT!!!!
I DUNKED TODAY!!!
A thunderous, two-hander that rocked the very foundation of Midgaard itself! Today, I kissed Zeus on the mouth. Fuck it, I FRENCHED him and ALSO sucked his cock (no homo).
For crying out loud
I’m beyond psyched that erection day is tomorrow. As a suitable replacement for election day, I’ll be letting my cock make all the decisions tomorrow.
October 2008
9 posts
69
I wonder who the first guy who decided to have sex with another guy was thinking the first time.
You know what? Fuck it.
Everyone who bitches that “no election/candidate/whatever-the-fuck” will change anything is fucking deluding themselves. Gavin McInnes, treated like a god among men, says voting is gay. I already posted this in the comments on streetbonersandtvcarnage.com, but because nobody reads that anymore, I’ll post it again here:
“Voting is gay”? Fuck you, YOU’RE fucking...
alsdfja
Sorry I haven’t been posting too much lately. I’ve been too busy cutting my dick off.
Just kidding, I didn’t do that. Or did I. (I didn’t).
Or…?
Word?
My professor told a little anecdote in class today about how he peed in a rest stop on his way to Duluth, MN. All I could think about was his old, gray, flaccid dick spraying into the back of the urinal with just enough force to splash back little droplets of piss back onto his hands, and him just wiping them off on his pantleg as he left the bathroom. Blech.
Plea to the fat girl in front of me today in...
Listen, there are a few things that you, as a decent and respectable human being, should not do. One of those things is not coming to class if you’re gassy or holding back a vicious shit. The fact that you’re making me and the rest of the class (but especially me) inhale your anal gases makes me so irritated I could pus, and you’re ruining my day.
If I could write this in key...
I'm never having sex again.
Today, as I was walking over the prison-styled interior of the Washington Avenue Bridge, I was handed a pamphlet by an elderly woman. It was addressing the always-timely issue of why having sex with a woman before we’re wed to eachother is going to send me to Hell. That got me pretty nervous, but I thought I might’ve found a loophole. Then I read that having sex with a man would...
I didn't want to open Microsoft Word
So I’m copy-pasting it here for my own future reference. You can go fuck yourselves.
If people cannot write well, they cannot think well, and if they cannot think well, others will do their thinking for them -George Orwell
September 2008
1 post
Hot news from Texas!
My friend from Texas sent me some n00dz of a girl he knows today. She wasn’t anything special. Maybe a 6.5 at most. He could probably degrade the fuck out of her though, so I encouraged him to do what any self-respecting man would.